Pet Loss Help

For many of us who have chosen to put down a beloved child of ours, I write this article to reach out to you and tell you that many of us are on the same boat, and we feel your pain!

Opting for Euthanasia for pets when they are terminally ill or irreversibly injured is one of the hardest choices a pet parent has to make. For most of us, it feels like you are killing a part of yourself and sometimes, others don’t understand it.

Pet loss grief is a personal process and differs from individual to individual. Some find it easier to deal with and some find it hitting them after sometime and some even can’t function. A recent loss is much tougher to deal with. Maybe a street animal reminds you of your pet, or a picture, or even coming home not to find them waiting for you. Honestly, it changed me as a child when I lost my first cat to a brutal attack by dogs. I still think about the gorgeous little tiger of mine. But I never in my life did I think that I would have to opt for euthanize for one of my children. But it had to be done, not for me, but for him.

The Vet Will Take The Decision For You…

When the vet advises to put your pet down, it is usually when you have done everything in your power to help them get better, live a painless and dignified life and there is no scope for recovery.

I must stress upon the statement where I mentioned above that the vet advises putting the animal down - please for the sake of humanity, one should not take matters into their own hands and decide for the animal just because its inconvenient or impractical to let a terminally ill animal or injured animal to live the remainder of their lives around their small little world, that is you. I visited SPCA recently and was made aware of several dogs being abandoned due to their old age or treatable wound! It is preposterous and inhumane. We are evolved creatures, hence, it is our responsibility to take care of beings said to be lesser evolved than us. For some, it might be exhaustive but if the animal has a chance, get them adopted but do not abandon or euthanize them! Also, please beware of vets that promote euthanasia and do get a second opinion before making the decision, this will help you and your child more than anything.

Pet Treatment Journey Can Be Exhaustive But It Is Worth It!

More than anything, it is torturous to see your pet go through regular injections, IVs, oral medicines and still notice less or no improvement. But it is a journey one needs to take. Seek help during the treatment, talk to your friends, family or write on animal groups online. Trust me, it is worth it, I have an old pet, who has no teeth, one functioning ear but boy, he can save himself and how, to just get back home! He gets wounded quarterly and it is frustrating and I can't imagine the pain he must be going through everytime he injures himself, to top the frustration it is tough to lock him inside because he goes insane after 1 month indoors, but what has to be done, has to be done! On the other hand, my young boy of 5 years with a neuro-degenerative problem was rendered paralyzed and couldn’t even move his head and was having regularly spasms due to a head injury. I recently put him down when the doctor told me to put an end to his misery. I am told I did my best by everybody around me, but it never feels like that. It might one day, but today, it doesn’t.

Pet Loss Grief...

Pangs of anxiety and doubt do tend to take over, you will wonder if you made the right decision or not! I can't answer the question of it being right or not for you because I, myself, am struggling to accept who was I to decide to end another beings' life?

My line of thought takes me to the scenario back to where my child was before he was put down - what was his condition, would he survive if I wasn't home and out for work, was he in pain, would he recover, would a miracle happen? Then comes the question, did he want to live? This question kills you! They never want to go, leave you physically and go, they will always want to come to you, sit on your lap, or drag themselves towards you because that is where they feel safe, that is where their heart is - you are their world! At the end, they are animals, they don't know more than that, their amygdalas aren't that evolved to wish for death even in pain or depression like ours does! That's the beauty of it! They are happy if you are with them even suffering from irreversible conditions! Hence, it is your decision to relieve them of their pain and misery.

Don't give up, even if you seldomly want to but if the animal still has a chance, ask a pet community to look for adoption opportunities. You don't want to look bad? Well, explain your situation, take some silent curses but at the end of it, the animal is getting better care.

Coping With Pet Loss...

Pet loss is a loss that many don’t understand, but it is okay for you to freely mourn the loss of your loved one. They were your family and will always be your family. And don’t be ashamed of it and don’t care if someone else doesn’t. It is your pain and s/he was your beloved.

Maybe start volunteering for animal shelters around you.Maybe, donate your pet clothes/toys/bowls.

Don’t try to replace your pet with another instantly, give yourself time. It will not be fair to the new pet coming into your home.

Maybe write to them sometimes, and save as a draft or pen it down. They are always watching over you (I’d like to believe)

Take to fellow pet parents who can empathize with you. Bottling up your feelings will not help.

I hope this article can help a bit. Do reach out to me, if you ever need someone to talk to when you get teary missing your baby.